Not while I was married . . . when I was 15.
I’m an only child so I always hung out with people older than me. I’m very confident, athletic, and outgoing.
I knew when someone was flirting with me and I knew how to reciprocate, but my knowledge ended there. So when my high school swim coach came onto me – I reciprocated. I was getting the attention I craved and – DAMN! he was a good kisser. That was my introduction to sex.
We had an affair for a year. Secret office trysts, stolen kisses, and sex in exciting places (because we couldn’t exactly go back to my parent’s house). I knew it was taboo before it was even a TV show.
And it was great fun . . . until the school found out – which means my parents found out (double sucky – my mom was a teacher at the same high school). I still don’t think anyone had proof, but the way we were ambushed there was no time for back pedaling. Cops, administrators, counselors, other students, and my parents present make it harder to get a story in line – so the truth it is.
My coach and I never spoke again. It was hard, never mind the legalities and my parents’ take on things. In order to save his ass it was my word against his. He had a failing marriage and the cutest 5 year old son. The school wanted to keep everything as quiet as possible, my mom wanted to keep her job, and we didn’t have the money to be embroiled in the courts for years. Over the next 4 years it came down to a defamation case where my coach sued the newspaper, so of course they wanted me on their side. I offered a video-taped deposition a week before I went off to college and haven’t looked back since. I couldn’t even tell you the outcome, except that I’m fine, we both have valid teaching certificates, and he never went to jail.
Confession: it wasn’t the affair, or the fact that I was 15, it was the way my parents handled it. I was the outcast, I was kept in the dark, and no one ever asked me what I wanted or needed. I never knew what was going on or when or why. I went to counseling sessions (that I hated) when they told me to and I showed up as they asked. Going to college as far away from home as possible was the best thing that ever happened to me (until I met my husband).