The Day of the Lucky Three-leaf Clovers

A field of clovers

Photo Credit: Shannon L. / Found on Yelp, Filoli: Photos

[Throwback Thursday — Originally published April 2014]

After spending a few hours playing outside with my son, once we were getting tired and I was trying to prepare myself for the fight to get him back inside, I sat down on the ground. I glanced at the grass all around me and realized most of it wasn’t actually grass; I was surrounded by clovers. (How I’ve lived here for about a year and just figured that out, I’m not quite sure.) So, while I was letting my son soak up the last bit of direct sunlight for the day, I started searching for the all-elusive four-leaf clover.

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Not all Prisoners are the Criminals in your Imagination

[Throwback Thursday — Originally published April 2014. Also part of a chapter in my memoir.]

Obviously, there are many ways to avoid getting arrested. But in reality, anything can happen. And to attack these people when you are utterly unaware of their side of the story, or the unbiased truth; to attack the people they love and who love them back, well, that’s not very humane at all. These people are hurting. They don’t need judgmental glances and gossip talked behind their backs; they need support and under-standing. Why have we become so incapable of that?

Photo Credit: Article Author: Arturo Castellanos

Photo Credit:

I love someone who is incarcerated. Actually, I love several people who are incarcerated — three, to be exact, and I’m sure I care about even more on a personal level, and probably more than half on a human level.

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I Did Not “Kill My Baby”

[Throwback Thursday — Originally published March 2014]

It astonishes me that so many people throw these words around: baby killer. Of course, these are typically the same people who find and advertise studies that say most women regret their abortions, or are intensely depressed after said abortion, or any other (usually false) statistic they can throw at you.

"Women DoNT Regret Abortion"

Photo Credit: Dave Fayram / Found On:

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Your Child’s First Bully

[Throwback Thursday — Originally published March 2014]

My son is almost three years old. He has been classified as “all boy” by many of my family members and friends when they see him bouncing off the walls, playing in dirt, crashing cars, and shooting fake guns. Other people have literally said the words “he might be gay” because, at the same time, his dressers are pink, he has several baby dolls he nurtures and cuddles as if they were real, he likes Barbies and Dora, and has a pink shopping cart he brings every time we go grocery shopping.

Breaking Free of Traditional Gender Roles

Photo Credit: Paul Windle / Found On:

Honestly, his sexual orientation doesn’t matter to me, not because he’s so young, but because it never will. I will always love him regardless. And, I am more than happy to buy him the pinkest, “girliest” toy on the shelves if he asks for it, because I see absolutely nothing wrong with it. 

Things, material things, are not masculine or feminine. We have defined them as so, but they’re not.

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Real Addict vs. Imaginary Addict?

[Throwback Thursday — Originally published March 2014]

I’ve had several people tell me I’m “not really an addict” in the past few weeks. Some were strangers, others were old friends, a few were barely acquaintances, and one was a very close family member. And their reasoning? Because NA did not work for me; because I don’t work the traditional 12 steps and have pursued my recovery along a different route.

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